LOVE LETTER -XL- ( For Everybody who was fall inlove )

Hello Dear...

I can see you in my mind, blushing over these feeble words and it makes me smile in a sad sort of way. You will be sitting there reading these sentences and feeling a little fear that I may well be obsessed; but also flattered and smug. Does this assuage your need for hero-worship? Were we not on a boat that last night you’d have seen me down on my knees – would that have sufficed? I knew we were reaching an ending of sorts and I wanted my feelings for you clearly understood.

Pen now and ink. These are all that are left to me. Again. As usual. Were you here now… what? I no longer know. My head is no longer clear and my heart has overflowed. It is dripping flames of agony and desire and longing throughout and over my body.

I hurt…......what more can I say? Silence and stillness.

Were you here now…? I’m not sure. Candles? Darkness? Which would better suit? Should I hide still in this solitude? Should I be ashamed of these feelings and the actions they require of me to be fulfilled? Possibly I have no shame left. Not after those moments with you. Why should I feel shame for loving someone? I tried to – a couple of times – because society says I am wrong to do what I have done. My mind, my heart, my soul – they disagree. My life, lived the way it has been, would have had me do no less. Only more, were that an option.

It is not. Silence and stillness.

For all that lack of light I could still see you clearly. Could you see my face that night? I hope so. I was smiling and laughing softly to myself over what a mouth can do without ever uttering a word.

Silence without stillness. I miss you.

Are you fearing obsession again? Don’t. I’m not. I’ve been obsessed before and this isn’t it. I know it well. I lived with it for a years. It is a dark and heavy feeling, deep with brooding and self-taught lies. My mind is free of that and clear enough to know the truth. Back then I couldn’t tell the difference between reality and my own brainwashing. I can now. Maybe it’s because I can differentiate between the two that I am so sad. Reality is a harsh and cold place to live at times

I guess now is one of those times.

Why can’t I feel you in my memory? I know the body was designed to forget the sensation of physical pain; was it fair of Allah to deny us the remembrance of physical pleasure also? Maybe it is a blessing that I do not have that to mourn over; to highlight even more forcibly what I no longer have. I don’t know. All I know is that I miss having you here to light up this darkness, roar through this silence and bring joy into this solitude.

Thank you for the memories… but won’t you please come out to play?

It’s okay.

I know you won’t..

But..my love for u is always full in my heart...

LOVE FOREVER.....

LOVE LETTER -XXXIX- ( For Everybody who was fall inlove )

Dear honey....

These past two years, with a clear head but full heart. I have no regrets, just this ineffable sadness lurking throughout my rooms of memory. To turn back time and savour those moments with you more deeply is an impossibility. Not because I do not have the means to time travel, for I do. Memory is a blessing I bear – one I often curse because it remembers all too clearly what I have lost. I can walk the corridors of the past with ease, each second with you is fresh and vivid; alive with sight and sound and scent. The impossibility lies in the fact that it is physically, emotionally and mentally beyond me to cherish those moments any more than I did at the timmye of their creation. They were experienced with more intensity than this frail heart and body should ever have been asked to bear as it was.

The pain lies now in the lack of sensation; the total numbness of my hands and body when I recall how you held me and kissed me. I can’t feel that. Without your touch these memories are just home videos thrown up on the vein-cracked wall of my mind. How is it that a person can still taste another’s ....... and yet be unable to bring to mind those feeling to hers?

I will tell u some thing though I m next to u … I love the way say … aahhhhaa … you can’t imagine How much I love you .. but I m scared for only n only one thing … will you love me like this forever ….. cause this is your love who made me crazy .. now If u will chage .. I really dont know what will I do …. I can’t even say .. I will die and go to some other world .. cause there also I would be searching you … I have always had a dream to get some one like you … I never know god could be so great full to me to send you to my life … You are my life … My heart ….. If I open my eyes I want to see you … If I want to hear some thing .. I only want to hear your voice ….. If sind comes to touch me .. I want it should touch u first and then come to me ….. I love uuuuu …

-LOVEFOREVERANA-

LOVE LETTER -XXXVIII- ( For Everybody who was fall inlove )

Dear honey....

How are you? Hope you are always doing fine. I am really appreciate and very understand what you mean to me... However, I am very great having you in my life because you are very special in my heart and in my dreams.We are never had any such relationship before, but this is the one of opportunity from the Allah to know someone like you.... also for sure that i really want to be part of you ...

When asked what I would say to you, I simply nodded. I said that I would hate you for eternity, for what you’ve done for sometime. However, in my heart, that is not what I feel. I am lost without you. I don’t even know where to begin. If I could say those words to make everything right, I would. Yet, I don’t. I will never know. That kills me, no; it destroys me, inside.

These past few months, they have been hard. On not just me, but everyone connected to us. I have drug people down with me, and that, is unforgivable. Yes, I admit I’ve done some horrible, unforgiving sins, yet not a day goes by where I don’t regret every one of them.

There have been times when I was haunted by my memories, tormented, as if they were mocking me! There were times when I’d have nightmares of them. Then I would dream of you. Yes, I’ve dreamt of you. Many nights I have. It hurt to see your face in my dreams. It hurt to see my past replaying in my head, but I still dream. I dream of what I would say if, I ever saw that sweet face of yours once more. Honey, I try to stop loving you. It destroyed us. Love is what tore us apart. I loved you too much, and it ruined our lives. Because of love, I am scarred for life. Therefore, I do not wish it any longer.

I have tried, and failed, ... At least, I have tried. I’ve only ever yearned to hear your melodic voice once more. No, I’m not attached. I’ve done my best to move on with my life. Yet there is still a calling within me that wonders how you are doing. How are you doing in your life without me in it? How have you grown? Have you learned to let go, and move on?

Why I have done this, you may ask. The answer is quite simple. Because I am nothing without you.Without you my days are "Sadday,"Moanday, "Tearsday, "Wasteday, "Thirstday, "Fightday", and "Shatterday". If you have 1000 years of age, I just want to have 999 years and 364 days, so I never have to live a day without you. I assume that knowing you were a great lover ..... To me, you are real. As real as a butterfly in the spring. As real as the rain in summer, or the snow in winter.

If my love is a question, I'm sure u are the answer.If loving you is a crime. I'd like to be jailed for my whole life, in your heart.

Love is not finding someone to live with, It's finding someone you can't live without.

-Loveforever-

LOVE LETTER -XXXVII- ( For Everybody who was fall inlove )

Dear Love,

I met you almost are years ago ............., and since that time, I have grown to love you so deeply. I have heard it said that long distance romances don't last, but I disagree. I know that what we are doing may be considered wrong by some, but I also know what I feel in my heart, and I know that it's real.I believe in destiny though just like I believe in luck and karma.

I lay awake at night, sometimes, and I cry 'cause I miss you so much. I know that we can't change the past, and I know that we can't predict the future, but my heart does not lie ... I am so in love with you.

I know I am not perfect and I have not made things easy for either of us but I Love You with all my heart. I will do whatever it takes to make this work. I cannot imagine a day without you in my life....

When your cogitation me so tenderly, my heart skips a beat. When I look into your beautiful eyes, I can see how much you love me. When we contemplate each other ...it's so sweetly and......., I can feel the emotion just by holding you closely... we may not be married to each other, but our love still goes on, and I just want you to know that you are precious to me and no matter how this story turns out, I will always love you, now and forever. I love you......

Love always,

-LOVEFOREVER-

LOVE LETTER -XXXVI- ( For Everybody who was fall inlove )

Honey...

I was on my way to bed and wanted to write you a little note. Thank you so much for having so much faith in me and in us as a couple. Thank you for making me a better person, and for giving your heart to me and opening up so much.I love you so much, and can't wait to be with you again. I want to give you my heart and soul.

Hey, Honey ... I miss you. I'm just here thinking about you, like I always do. I hope you're as happy as me; Sunday is almost here again. I just want you to know how much I love you.Ever since the first time I heard you on the phone and heard your cute voice, I miss you every second of my life.

The perfect thought is us together forever. The sweetest word is your name. And the greatest thing is your love. Every silent prayer that has left my mind, all the empty words that have left my mouth and chased my lips, and all the lonely tears that have escaped my eyes have made me who I am, one to love you more. All the times I felt I've found the one, and all the times I've mourned over a bleeding heart, all the times I've given it all I've got is are as many as I have found my face in the mud.

All the times we fight feels like we're gambling our lives. I hope we never lose. I love you so much, those five words I tell you so much can't have more meaning than anything else ever possibly could. I love you with all my faults and all my achievements. I love you with all that I am. I love you for who you are. I hope in the quietest of the night when I whisper out to you you know just what to do. You listen to hear my voice echoing how much I love you.

Love Always.......

-LOVE FOREVER-

LOVE LETTER -XXXV- ( For Everybody who was fall inlove )

My Dearest.....

No doubt you know by this time that I'm playing this little game of love in earnest. The single thought of the days I've wasted makes me want for you more and more, and I'm smiling through my tears to think of all those years I've needed your sympathy. You've been my guide to light and my inspiration and of all things that have been my pleasures, there is not a single one which I would not give up for the one I love

My only thoughts are of what I can do to make you happy, to allay your fears and restore your faith and love and trust in me and for me.The more I love you though the more I fear losing you. I have no idea the thoughts, feelings and memories that haunt you and keep you from loving me the way that I want and need you to. I only know that what ever it is that effects you so deeply must be real and profound and that only you can work through what is confusing you so. But know that I am here for you a new and changed... ready to give you everything I have in my heart and soul to help you.

I have looked inside myself to see who I am, what I want and what kind of future that I want...For better for worse, in sickness and in health till death do us part, I believe in that, I am committed to that. I will honor it gladly, happily with love and passion. You are what I want - what I need. In my eyes the sun rises and sets with you, you color my world and bring joy to me..

Dear...you are my world, I am lost without you, I am a rudderless ship floating on stormy seas without you in my life. I love you so, so very much. My desire and lust for you burns hotter than the fire of the sun. When I look at you I see so much handsome, natural and sensuality. For me, that will never change - I promise. If you let me and teach me, I will be the lover that you deserve. I receive so much pleasure and satisfaction when I see you smile or when you're happy and I know I had something to do with that happiness.

I will spend the rest of my life as the happiest woman on earth - simply by making you happy. I love you always and forever.

-LOVEFOREVER-

LOVE LETTER -XXXIV- ( For Everybody who was fall inlove )

Honey...

When I met you, my life could not have been in a worse state. My heart had been broken too many times to count and life just didn't seem worth living anymore. Then you came along. From the first time I laid eyes on you, I knew that you would be someone that would make me smile again. You had such a warm, soft look on your face that I knew there was comfort and friendship in your heart. We started out as friends and you were the rock I needed in my life. I soon began to realize that what I was feeling for you was more than a friendship... something so overwhelming and wonderful that I couldn't even believe it myself. You opened my heart to new and wonderful things! You showed me what love really is and showed me that I was worth loving.

I know that things between us went terribly wrong. I want to fix them. I am not pointing fingers or placing blame on anyone. I just want to fix them.

So, I try to let you go and my heart aches because I can feel the pain and the confusion...I also feel the pain of letting go what could have been the best thing in my life, but you see, I can't do it anymore ... tried it too many times before. You know what the saddest part is? I am willing to live with the pain of never knowing what could have been than risk my heart ever again.Does that mean that we stopped loving each other? Absolutely not. You're a very special soul in my life and you will always continue to be. I love you with all my being and I accept that we are now traveling down different paths in our lives, but my love for you will always remain constant and my past of you will be relived in my dreams. Though our roads are different, our paths will always cross and maybe someday in the future, our roads will meet and we will travel down the same path once again, until then my sweet love ... in my heart is where you always reside.

I miss you so much. I know that you are going to some where soon and I am dreading it. I am scared I will never see your sweet face again. I will be praying for your safe return.I am praying that you will come to see me again. Until then I will keep trying and hoping for the best. What and who I always thought you were is not what or who you have become or are becoming. I only hope and pray that the journey you are on of self discovery includes me when you reach the end of that journey.

Well, I just wanted to let you know that you are never far from my heart or mind; I still love you and I will forever miss my "Bam" until God helps our paths to cross once more, I still love you.

Love Always,

LOVEFOREVER